The Things We Don’t Say – Summertime Sadness

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With mixed messaging on social media, and the narrative surrounding bodies over the years, summer can be a tough month for a lot of us. Farrah Saville talks about the lack of optimism around bodies and the need to accept ourselves.

As we enter the month of May I am reminded by the shops around me that summer is indeed here. And, when you’re an expat in the Middle East, summer really screams summer. Over the years, I have often felt shamed by this season. Bikini bods, fresh summer salads, and enjoying long dips in the pool or sea have made me and this body feel a little left out. I would often go to beaches and not fully be present or enjoy myself because I wondered how I looked to others.

Over the years, the feelings worsened and I think the mixed messaging from social platforms and media definitely contributed to it. So, there was definite messaging around the gym bunny culture for extended periods of time during the 80s when I grew up (Hello, Jane Fonda!) and then this trend continued in beauty and fashion magazines in the 90s. Enter the era of Instagram and the perfect body foundations were sealed into my twenties.

Over the last few years, the messaging from platforms like Tiktok has been somewhat mixed, adding to the feelings of confusion and lack of optimism around my own body positivity. So, messaging like ‘love your body’ on one feed may be misinterpreted as accepting that being unhealthy is okay and that taking steps toward being healthy often doesn’t fit the agenda of ‘loving yourself’.

Diet culture is also another factor which has played out over the years, “Here’s a recipe to bake a cake”, “Eat healthy!” or “Salads don’t keep you full”. Within the scroll of a button, you can be left spiraling about what exactly equates to a healthy body, what to eat and of course wondering about all the mistakes you have made with your own health journey. It can all be a little confusing feeling like there is an information overload which can so easily be internalised!

As I look at my daughter, I hope that social media will be a thing of the past when she grows up for these mixed if not negative and incorrect messaging.

If it does continue, then I would love the focus to be on health and living healthy from a scientific perspective. For example, more and more research says that exercise alone is more beneficial for your mental health then it is for losing weight, that the body mass index measurement may not be accurate (according to an article published on Medical News Today) and that certain fats may be good for you.
I hope that the source of information evolves so that it is science-based and easily accessible and understandable. I hope the focus is on a healthy body and mind instead of what your body looks like.

More importantly, I hope she gets to see and have a healthy mama, who is happy in her body so that she may do the same for herself and accept who she is while maintaining being healthy without it being such an effort but instead a way of life.

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